On Growing Up

This year I turned 30. It wasn't a big deal, thirty schmirty I thought. Until. UNTIL. Recent events. On the way home from Kroger tonight--because at 30 with 3 kids a trip to the grocery store after dinner alone is kinda a big deal. I saw a tax business and on the sign they boasted "Since 1981". I snickered...ooh big deal 1981 that's only like--holy crap--thirty years ago. And I was born...and thirty years is a long time for a business. And did I mention that a few weeks ago I was at a friends house where I may or may not have been one of the oldest there. And we were pulling up some music and on the TV I see a music station titled "Classic Rap" Hold up right there. Classic Rap. That's not possible, Rap just came out like last year. Classic is like old. But wait. 30 isn't old. It surely isn't. But when I was 18, 30 was old. It just happened. I was trucking along living my life not counting the years but the days until my next birthday. Happily reminding everyone and anyone I met. Eager for it to come. And now I look up and I am 30. Not old, but 30. And I am a grown up and I don't feel like it. I feel like a child raising children. I want to stop and look at them and say who are you and why must you call me Mommy and ask me to give you drinks. Because I am certainly not old enough or responsible enough to have you. But I am. And I have. And it's wonderful. But from time to time I stop and think. Wow. This is my life. It's awesome, It's amazing. But where did the time go. Wasn't I just sitting at home polishing my tennis shoes getting ready to head to kindergarden. (because I so did). Didn't I just move to a new school in a new town where I cried from being so incredibly shy and nervous. Amazing how time flies. Not just for my children's lives but my own. 30 is not old. 30 is just beginning. But when you are extra young 30 is old. 30 is a milestone. 3 decades of life. Amazing. What's stranger still is the thought of looking back at my own children's lives when they are 30...because if the past 30 years of me have flown the next 22 of them will rocket.